Frustration and failure

Blog, Creativity, Scribbles

So this week about painting self portraits. What is important is colour just like the week before.

Yesterday I prepared a wooden board so that I could paint on it today, I experimented with some texture clay I had laying around, as you can se in parts of the painting. Until lunch everything went fine. I was stupid enough not to take a picture of this fairly good job I had put down on this portrait. After lunch I put on a transparent brownish colour, my aim was to just get an even colour to work from, because before it felt like I couldn’t decide really what colour to use. I kind of started a bit all over when I did this, but it felt good, and then it just went straight down to hell from there. I failed so miserably in comparrison to what I wanted to make. I rarely sketch my paintings with pencil or charcoal, I use a lighter colour and sketch with my brush. But I just felt like it couldn’t get worse, so I use charcoal and made a sketch on top of this mess to hope I would be able to save it from its disaster.

Right then and there my teacher(not my teacher in painting) thought it would be great to have  a chat about my project work, he comes in and points at the painting from last week. He really liked that one. And then he looks at my mess of a portrait. Silence. It was horrible, he points out how I shouldn’t put so much effort into the sketch but the colours instead. I should paint like I did last week, I should bring that with me into this assignment too. And somewhere inbetween I tried to tell him about my process, and most importantly, how I usually NEVER use charcoal or any other straight-on sketch method. He blurts out some artist I should look up, tell me we will talk tomorrow and leaves. Did he even hear me?

The artist was not very good, plain boring artist to be honest. I did not get much through and all I have done today is waste my time on a really bad painting.


I am not that fond of showing off work I don’t like myself, but I kind of promised someone to put up some kind of process, and here it is.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I will make sure to make it into a productive day. I will bring everything bad from today and make it into something brilliant tomorrow. I even heard it will be sunny tomorrow, what could possibly go wrong?



One thought on “Frustration and failure

  1. Jag känner så igen mig i det du beskriver. Ibland vet man inte riktigt vad man har gjort och ibland är det fantastiskt. Men så vet jag att en ny dag ger nya möjligheter :).

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